Published inThe HavenWhen You Consider the Alternatives, This Polar Vortex Really Isn’t So BadThe recent California wildfires have restarted the “why would anybody live there?” conversation. These doomsday chats always seem to…Jan 221Jan 221
Published inThe HavenI’m a Boob for Visiting this Website During the Holidays’Tis the season for inadvertently clicking on holiday offers from online merchants and spending the weeks leading up to Christmas firmly in…Nov 27, 2024Nov 27, 2024
Published inThe HavenWho Won the Election? I was Bathing and VacuumingMy cell rang about 2 p.m. on Nov. 5, some three hours before election polls closed on the East Coast.Nov 13, 20242Nov 13, 20242
Published inThe HavenBefore You Die, Swim Naked and Fully ClothedImagine treading water wearing a business suit. Blue jeans. A sweater. Or whatever you chose to wear when you left the house that morning…Oct 18, 2024Oct 18, 2024
Published inThe HavenYou’re Getting Divorced? At 60? I’m Sorry…Or Congratulations!The following is an excerpt from Greg Schwem’s latest book, Turning Gut Punches into Punch Lines: A Comedian’s Journey Through Cancer…Oct 4, 20241Oct 4, 20241
I’m Funnier than Artificial Intelligence. AI Just Told Me SoI have tried, since I first heard the term, to stay away from artificial intelligence.Sep 9, 2024Sep 9, 2024
Published inThe HavenPass Your Phone to the BallparkVendor on the AisleI celebrated our nation’s birthday by taking in a ballgame at Wrigley Field, a park known for its rich history, neighborhood location and…Jul 11, 2024Jul 11, 2024
Published inThe HavenStumbling My Way Off the Presidential Debate Stage and BallotWhen I was 5, I remember telling my dad I wanted to someday be president. He smiled and began peppering me with questions, clearly enjoying…Jun 27, 2024Jun 27, 2024
Published inThe HavenWake Up, Have Sex, Nap: Why I Want to be a 17-Year CicadaIt was the sound I’d been anticipating, as I began a late afternoon May stroll on a golf course somewhere in East Tennessee. Thousands of…May 15, 2024May 15, 2024
Published inThe HavenAt the Merchant’s Request, My Review of Shredded CheeseI yawned as I read the subject line in my inbox, this email courtesy of Jewel-Osco, my local grocery store.May 3, 2024May 3, 2024
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